“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you…” Isaiah 26:3 (NIV)
It’s so much easier to see things after the fact then while I’m walking through them. Back in February when I had lost my job and didn’t have another job to replace it, I panicked. I told myself I wouldn’t, but I did anyway. I felt pressure that I needed a job even though I thought I heard God tell me to “wait.” I didn’t hear “rest” like I had in 2013, but I did think I heard “wait.” And I wish I had listened more closely instead of panicking and trying to “fix” something that in God’s eye wasn’t broken.
He had (and has) our finances taken care of. I was the only one freaking out about them – they were (and are) paid for every month. We haven’t been living with much extra (and some months only the critical bills are getting paid) but God is still supplying and we are still being taken care of.
Knowing now what I do and how God has allowed me to step into two exciting jobs, continue a fast-paced writing schedule this year (and I thought I was busy last year), begin an exciting me back my fiction writing journey (slowly), and two extended trips this summer with family, I wish I had taken all of February and half of March to just “wait” like He whispered. That would have been better preparation for this busy but incredibly fulfilling role. I feel that God has allowed me to use my gifts and talents in roles that I believe He specifically created for me, and while incredibly fulfilling, it’s still tiring. I wish I had taken a little more time to recover from my previous job commitment and the exhaustion from that fast-paced lifestyle before stepping into another equally busy but oh so rewarding ministry.
I have a friend who is not quite as far on her journey as I am on mine…and I gave her the advice I wish I had listened to. I suggested to her that maybe if God isn’t supplying a job right now, He is giving her a chance to catch her breath after all their family has been through these past two years. I reminded her that when (not if) He is ready for her to step into employment, it will be the right fit…and until then, He will continue to provide as He has done for them in the past.
I know the wait is hard…believe me, having recently experienced it, it can be brutal. But maybe, if I can offer some advice I wish I had taken myself, enjoy the time that God gives you, the break, and try to see it from the perspective of a gift. If you truly are being obedient and following His plan, He will continue to provide for you while maybe allowing you a chance to catch your breath before your next exciting adventure begins. I believe God allows us periods of resting in between assignments because He knows our bodies need that refreshment. Today’s society is so hard on our bodies – with all the sitting at desk jobs and the stress of living and pressure to cram so much into such a small amount of time. Our brains rarely have a chance to rest because of all the information bombarding us. And even when we intentionally try to take a break, it’s nearly impossible.
Yes, I wish I had taken my own advice. While I love the position God is allowing me me to be in for this season, I wish I had rested a little more when given the opportunity. Maybe that’s why He allowed two once in a lifetime opportunities for some family vacation time. He knew I wouldn’t listen the first time but loves me enough to help me get it right and truly let myself recharge.
© Cheri Swalwell 2015