“But I have raised you up[a] for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.” Exodus 9:16 (NIV)
I spoke last time about how God started talking to me about my writing journey back in January and through a series of conversations throughout the year, showed me a truth that I hope will encourage you as well.
After God didn’t give me any writing goals to achieve in 2016 and my schedule just became increasingly busier juggling family activities and two jobs, I got discouraged instead of encouraged. I thought maybe God was telling me this writing journey was over; however, that thought contrasted with the passion God planted in my heart that hasn’t come to fruition yet.
I wasn’t sure how to resolve that conflict until God showed me through a series of different sources that my problem might be completely different than what I thought it was. I was more concerned with comparing my journey to others’ instead of focusing on the unique journey God had our family on.
In my mind, I’d been working hard to fulfill this purpose for God for five years. It felt as though instead of continuing to grow to the next level, I was moving backwards. I was publishing less books instead of more, I wasn’t attending any trainings or conferences to further my skills and my other goals were sitting in my computer instead of getting closer to completion.
That’s when God reminded me, the only race I need to worry about is my own. I’m not competing with other people and their journeys. I’m only competing against myself. As long as I keep focused on my Master’s voice, then I’m winning. Just like with My Fitness Pal when I compete against myself regarding how much I exercise and eating the correct number of calories for my own body, my writing goals and journey are between God and I. There will be seasons when I’m moving faster and seasons meant for slowing down. There will be seasons when I’m growing and spending more time in the classroom and seasons where I’m collecting life experiences to use to help others later.
When I stepped back and looked at things from God’s perspective instead of my own small view, I am more able to see the bigger picture and it brings me peace. Did I ever get the promise from God that if I choose to obey and step back a little during this season I will indeed get the promised ministry I want? Nope. I got something better. I still have that seed of passion growing inside of me. I can tell that whatever God has planned for our family isn’t done yet. I may not know what the ending looks like, but I do know I want God to stay in the driver’s seat and I’m happy riding shotgun. Obeying, doing my part but waiting on Him for the right schedule.
© Cheri Swalwell 2016