I grew up the youngest in a household of women (and my dad). As the youngest, with the most passive personality, I usually was given the job of “dishwasher,” while my mom and my sister cooked. I was okay with that. I could daydream, I didn’t have to worry about burning anything, and that job assignment might have had something to do with the fact I liked to experiment when given the opportunity to cook. Purple cottage cheese, red cake … I liked food coloring a lot!
Not only did I have the privilege of working alongside my mom and sister, but now that I’m in ministry, I have the opportunity to work alongside some amazing friends. One friend and I are going to be co-writing a Bible study/fiction book for teen girls.
Another friend and I launched a podcast together, “Cheer UP! Podcast” this past January. It’s exciting to share ministry with those I’ve been doing life with for years.
However, just as I realized the wisdom of referring to one main cook in the kitchen to avoid disasters, I approached each of my friends and explained we needed to have “one main cook in our kitchen as well,” and I was giving them the promotion. That didn’t mean I wasn’t willing to work hard. It also didn’t mean I couldn’t have an opinion. It just means I was willing to allow them to be the main “boss,” and I was the second in command.
Both projects I was working on with each of my friends were their original ideas. If I had presented the ideas to them and said, “will you work with me,” I would have gladly stepped into the role as main spokesperson. But I hadn’t. So I didn’t.
Similar to a biblical marriage where the man is the head of the household, it doesn’t mean he dominates over me, or I don’t have an opinion. It means he shoulders the responsibility of making sure we are safe, protected, and taken care of. A true partnership, whether in marriage, business, or friendship has mutual respect and mutual hard work. But each work better when one is the main cook in the kitchen and the other works equally hard in the supportive role. I relish the supportive role.
What about you? Are you more of the main cook in the kitchen personality? If yes, do you take others’ feelings into consideration and treat their opinions equally as your own? Are you more comfortable in the supportive role? What does that mean for you exactly?
I am so excited about the opportunity to work with my two friends on projects near and dear to both of us. And I love being able to support, work hard, and present our gifts to those who need it most.
© Cheri Swalwell 2021